Thinly Veiled Support

We are indirectly told that SNL does not mean any of its Hillary sketches to be political endorsements of Clinton. Hillary herself even directly mentioned this in a recent appearance, supposedly an “editorial response” to a recurring, popular skit that has Amy Poehler’s Hillary debating Fred Armisen’s Barack Obama. The skit shows journalists fawning like school girls at every word uttered by Obama and either ignoring Hillary’s pleas for fairness or actually twisting things to favor Obama and disfavor Hillary.

In her response, the real Clinton stated “I adore Amy’s impression of me.” and added that the SNL people repeatedly told her not to consider their skit a political endorsement.

I guess making one candidate look like a noble victim of unfair media bias as journalists lob cupcake questions at the other candidate is a balanced presentation by SNL’s reasoning.

If the debate skits are not bad enough, we were served with an even more blatant example of SNL’s adoring support of Hillary. In a parallel to Hillary’s famous 3 a.m. call ad, we see a newly elected Barack Obama calling Hillary at 3 a.m. to ask her how to respond to numerous world issues and situations. The exchange is presented via voice-overs of still photos with Poehler and Armisen portraying the two principals. A frantic Obama is nearly beside himself in stress and anguish, overwhelmed by the enormity and complexity of the tasks before him, and a calm and collected Clinton is seen guiding and scolding him through step-by-step instructions as she looks at her nails.

Hillary tries to soothe a freaking Obama and, referring to his struggles, she suggests that he “chalk it up to inexperience.” The skit tells us that Obama has been calling Hillary every night for help, but that she is willing to do what she can “for the good of the country.” We see Obama cursing with each frantic realization that he is in over his head, and Hillary asking him to kindly avoid the profanity, citing it as one of his “least attractive traits that the country does not know about.” Considering the legends of Hillary Clinton’s real use of vulgarity behind closed doors, I found that profanity part amusing. At the end of the skit, Obama even asks Hillary for help setting the White House thermostat, carefully taking notes just as he did for how to avoid an international crisis.

In these skits and numerous off-hand SNL references, the program makes its support of Hillary Clinton plainly obvious. The message is clearly made that Obama is an inexperienced novice out of his element and Hillary is an experienced, efficient, honest, polished and competent alternative. While the Obama theme hits reality, the Clinton one hits irony.

The Three SNL Amigos

The most ironic part of SNL’s adulaton of Clinton is that, while Poehler bears a striking resemblance to Hillary’s appearance in her skits, two other SNL characters, past and present, bear just as striking a resemblance to Hillary’s behavior in their behavior.

Long-time SNL fans will recall Comedian actor Jon Lovitz, an SNL regular from 1985 to 1990, who has since gone on to star in numerous films. One of Jon’s most memorable SNL characters was Tommy Flanagan, a pathological liar who would tell outrageous, unbelievable lies to make himself sound important. His speech pattern made him seem to be making up lies on the spot, so that when he came up with a particularly good lie he would utter his catchphrase, “That’s the ticket!” One of Flanagan’s recurring lies was that he was married to Morgan Fairchild.

Current fans should know that present cast member Kristen Wiig plays Penelope, a habitual braggart/compulsive liar who tells elaborate stories to one-up those around her. In her struggle to appear relevant, important and cool, Penelope seems obsessed with not letting others’ achievements overshadow her own. If they say they have just earned a PhD, she will say she has ten of them, and even earned the first one ever given. This pathetic effort to one-up everyone continues until, by the end of the skit, her claims are as preposterous and absurd as can be, leaving those around her more in pity than admiration.

Considering SNL’s obvious, fawning adoration and support for Hillary Clinton, I find it ironic and amusing that two of their characters, one past and another present, resemble Hillary’s behavior just as much as Amy Poehler resembles her appearance. In ironic fashion, Hillary Clinton is the real-life representation of Tommy Flanagan and Penelope, churning one absurd tale after another in a pathetic attempt to one-up everyone, appear important, sound relevant and seem eminently experienced and qualified.

Hillary’s Own Skits

Hillary Clinton has starred in at least as many skits as Jon Lovitz, Kristen Wiig and Amy Poehler combined, and her character makes Tommy Flanagan and Penelope seem genuine by comparison.

The three most recent tall tales in the news involve Hillary’s Bosnia sniper landing fable, her Northern Ireland peace messiah claim, and her delusional claim to have been instrumental and central to the passing of the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA). In each case, Hillary’s version of reality has been contradicted by numerous eyewitnesses and parties involved in the situations and, in the case of the Bosnia flap, by actual video footage.

The Bosnia video shows a smiling and calm Hillary and her daughter greeting a small girl where Hillary claimed to have been running to avoid sniper fire. The Northern Ireland people recall Hillary as a smiling observer and no more. Finally, the real principals of the FMLA wonder in amazement just where and when Hillary had anything at all to do with the passage of that bill.

We can assume, of course, that Flanagan and Penelope did not sink to their pattern of lies in one day, and neither did Clinton. If it was not claiming to be a Yankees fan, an expert hunter, an accomplished expert in military armor or a student of the Bible, it was being a buddy of Mother Teresa. Hillary made these claims despite being known as a life-long Cubs fan, not being able to say anything about hunting or military armor beyond prepared notes, showing a very limited knowledge of the Bible and having to remove inferences and photos of any close association with Mother Teresa.

My two personal favorites involve being named after Sir Edmund Hillary and claiming that Chelsea was jogging near Ground Zero on 9/11 when the planes hit. This despite being born while Hillary was an unknown and evidence that Chelsea was in bed watching the events unfold. I have noticed that liberal journalists tend to ignore this pathological pattern of lies and many conservative ones tend to brush it off as “big surprise, Hillary is a liar.” I am sad to say that this trait should neither be ignored nor brushed aside as obvious.

While it is no surprise that “objective journalist” Katie Couric is too busy anointing Hillary as a saint to even refer to her deceptions, we cannot let ourselves, and our society, reach the other extreme of brushing off Hillary’s complete disrespect for even a hint of reality and truth as some famous foible.

I am too cynical and have enough brains to realize that all politicians stretch the truth as best they can, but I have never seen nor heard of one who can do so as often, as blatantly, as pathetically and in such a matter-of-fact way as Hillary does on a regular basis. While she has always lied, what has changed is the media’s undivided loyalty and protection of her. Where before they ignored this pattern, many of them now focus on it as it were some recent, unexpected revelation. If truth be told, Hillary has always been, is now and will always be a consistent acrobat regarding the truth, flying through fiction with the greatest of ease.

If the media is still protecting this queen of mistruth, it is in allowing her to keep on brushing off her lies as “misspeak”, “misquotes” or “confusion.” One misspeaks when saying “North Dakota” instead of “South Dakota”. One is misquoted when one says one thing and another is reported. One is confused when one mistakes one event for another in one’s life. None of these three things has happened to Hillary Clinton. She has lied, regularly, often and blatantly, and has gotten away with it for far too long. Only now is some media attention being directed at this trait, and that only because the media has found a new love in Barack Obama. Still, old flames die hard, and the media still gives Clinton a pass by letting her use Clintonese to squirm her way out of the fact that most of what she claims about herself is about as real as unicorns.

Conclusion

This is not about SNL’s obvious loyalty and love of Hillary Clinton. Neither is it about her long and infamous history of deception and distortion in a pathetic attempt to seem important, relevant or experienced. What it is about is the ironic, unwitting similarity between two of SNL’s characters, past and present, and this woman whom that program now wishes to anoint the answer to this country’s prayers. While Amy Poehler looks the part of Hillary Clinton, Jon Lovitz and Kristen Wiig act the part of Hillary Clinton to perfection.

Now we hear Hillary comparing herself to Rocky Balboa and vowing not to give up. The only problem with that comparison is that if Hillary played the part of Rocky Balboa, he would have won the fight in the first movie and been elected to the boxing hall of fame that afternoon by national referendum. In Hillary’s tales, the characters are real but the story is completely fictional, to protect Clinton from being revealed as nothing but hot air and imagination. Hillary does not need to compare herself to any fictional characters because she is one, or, at least the persona she has built on fertilizer for public consumption. However, if she were to compare herself to any such character, Pinocchio would be the obvious choice. He wanted very badly to be a real boy and she wants just as badly to be a real answer to anything this country needs. Pinocchio’s dream came true but, unfortunately for Hillary, hers never will, even if she is elected.

Flanagan, Penelope and Clinton sounds like a law firm but, in truth, they are SNL’s three faces of deception which have brought laughter to anyone who enjoys watching obvious liars at work. Tommy is married to Morgan Fairchild, Penelope earned the first PhD ever given and Hillary is eminently qualified to be President. That’s the ticket!

Copyright by Gabriel Garnica