Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharkey, a self-described satanic vampire, has been a media eyesore since his announcement to run for Governor of Minnesota on January 13th, 2006 under the Vampires, Witches, and Pagans Party.

Since then, he's been on the national and local news for his unrealistic political aspirations and arrests involving bizarre death threats against underage girls, county judges, and even the President of the United States.

The self-described vampire had two award winning documentaries done about his surreal life and he even tried declaring sovereignty from the United States by creating the Vampire Nation somewhere in the Eagle mountains of Tennessee. He threatened that if he did not get his independence that he'd ally himself with Russia and the country's military would attack the people of Minnesota.

Recently, Sharkey stirred up a hellish controversy when he helped an unstable 16-year-old girl from Minnesota runaway from home. They took refuge in some cheap motel as he declared his undying love for the Minor and declared that he would wed her once the Teenager got emancipated from her Mother.

The friends and family of the 16-year-old girl worried for days, but thankfully the police were able to convince him and the 16-year-old to meet them some place to see if the girl was safe. It was there that cops grabbed Sharkey by the arm, threatening him with arrest if he made trouble and got the young woman to safety.

Shortly after, he was served an order for protection from the Mother of the 16-year-old and was ordered by cops to get on the fastest Greyhound bus out of Minnesota.

Due to Sharkey's intolerable behavior, several popular Vampire and Pagan groups condemned his actions, proclaiming through press releases that he does not represent their beliefs or members.

Sharkey's bus stopped in Florida where he has announced his bid for Governor of Florida, but not as a member of the Vampires, Witches and Pagans Party. Instead, he declares he's running as a Republican.

Remember his undying love for the 16-year-old in Minnesota? Well, he ended it for an Internet relationship with another teenager from Ohio.
Sad does not begin to cover it.

"Instead of running for Governor of MN, I will now run in Florida as a Republican." Sharkey goes on to declare, "I intend on seeking support from my fellow Republicans in the House and Senate to pass federal laws to address child protection and harsh criminal punishment upon those who abuse their children."

Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharkey running as a Republican is an enigma. It's obvious that no one from the Republican Party would rightfully endorse him, but his plans are hypocritical on two fronts.

1. Sharkey is a repeated offender when dealing with under aged children. He threatened to murder one back in 2007 and helped another runaway in 2010. If any laws were passed to protect children, it would be against him, not in favor of him.

2. The core beliefs of the Republican Party is to keep government limited and to uphold the Republic in which it stands. Sharkey has claimed that if he were ever in a position of executive power, he would defy federal and state laws and run it as a Monarchy, even impaling people in his front lawn. A trait that true Republicans despise and have shown by Tea Party protests.

Sharkey's chances to win an election anywhere in the country is obviously beyond slim to none. However, it is essential that Republican leaders in Florida denounce him as one of their own before Keith Olberman has a field day with it.
 
Copyright by Richard Mullenax
 
Richard Mullenax is a Libertarian and Capitalist Blogger who strongly opposes progressive and socialist philosophy. To know more about Richard, go to www.arichmind.org or e-mail him at thenospinkid@aol.com